Athel Mori Scoring Glories

Race:  Wood Elf
Coach:  Riley
Beyond the misty coasts of Grand Cathay lays a small chain of islands, great sloped mountains rising from the ocean. Wreathed in mist stands the last great forest of this distant realm, Athel Mori, where the noblest of the old elf clans practice the great arts: cultivating the sea, taming the mountains, studying the ways of the blade and bow, and above all… the true art of Blood Bowl. Enter the Scoring Glories.

A field in blood sown
And within every drop
Our victory blooms.

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Athel Mori Scoring Glories team badge
Bulletin board from the coach
July 15th, 2021
Death Drives on the Pitch
“That is not dead which eternal may find a match.
For when strange eons pass, even death may catch.”

This enigmatic epitaph is all we could get from the wood elves’ head coach before their first game of the season today. The Scoring Glories were on the field stretching and passing long before the coin toss, wondering whether the undead shamblers of Death By Rock N’ Roll would even show. As an away game on the islands of Nippon beyond Great Cathay, no one could hardly blame them. But the terrible truth revealed itself as a lineelf tripped and screeched over a pale, decrepit hand rising from the pitch. The Rockers had actually arrived a day early, partied long into the night, and were now rumbling back to the life as their head necromancer prepared a wicked ritual from the lore of metal with an arcane set of amps and subwoofers. As the dead rose from wherever they had fallen from last night’s festivities, the record-attendence in the Grand Mori Temple to Nuffle knew the game was on— and that they should have brought ear plugs.

Billy Ba’al here, halfling sports and war correspondent for the End Times weekly paper, to cover this opening match in the much-coveted, much-cursed-at Critical Hit Cup. After rolling the bones, Death By Rock N’ Roll’s head necromancer elects to kick at the start of the first half. Maybe it’s me, or maybe it’s the funny-smelling smoke coming from the Rocker’s locker room, but it is starting to get swelteringly hot here at the Grand Temple. Let’s hope it doesn’t adversely affect the players. Woah… I just realized my quill feather used to be on a bird. Wheeee! Fly quilly, fly! Dude, I could sure use some concessions about now…

It will have to wait! The first kick is on point, and Death By Rock N’ Roll are showing there’s still life in those limbs. A successful blitz play puts the woodies on the back foot in the first half. That doesn’t stop them from making a few passes to each other in the back field. Someone should tell that thrower the game has started. But the crowd is loving it, and their cheering only amplifies when two of the undead lineman are knocked out. The Scoring Glories seem to be toying with their opponents. At last the solo catcher makes a run, handing off to a lineelf who barrels down the field. Could this be the early touchdown the Glories are famed for? Suddenly cut off, the lineelf must double back where he hands off to Wardancer Tyrionojo Cothiqaru. Wardancer gets the ball, gets ready, and… oh! A zombie puts him down for the count.

After a rocky series of plays which happened too fast for me to record, and not just because that smoke is really taking the edge off, the Glories’ catcher runs it in for a touchdown. However, the teams are not looking too hot. Oh wait, that is the problem. A wardancer and blitzer collapse and are hauled off to the sidelines.

The remaining half sees the undead lineup of Death By Rock N’ Roll coordinating with jaw-dropping finesse, despite the dropping of several lineman’s jawbones. After knocking some heads and kicking some asrai, a ghoul is able to saunter into the endzone with the ball just before halftime is called. Things are looking grave for the Glories, whose heat-struck wardancer is immediately supplanted by another wardancer! When called on to comment after the game, they would insist that they were pausing to perform mandatory stretching exercises. On the visiting team, another blitzer was lost to the heat despite a shocking lack of organs.

Going into the second half, the remaining wardancer seems to have snuck in something shiny between his knuckles. After the kick he quickly knocked a lineman the ground, but after the skeleton cried out to his mummy he was swiftly avenged. That’s a wrap on Tyrionojo for now. The ghouls prove again they are no puny elf’s fool as they cage up and march up the field with impunity to finish the game 1 to 2. After a solid thrashing for much of the game, thrower Naeyama Lorenoshi returns for another famous pass and time is called before any more broken elves are thrown in their macabre sauna of a dugout.

The Athel Mori Scoring Glories will have to step up their performance if they want a chance to compete in their first Critical Hit Cup. Anyone else who has a bone to pick with Death By Rock N’ Roll will certainly need to prepare themselves against another flawless performance, lest they themselves meet death by being rocked— or possibly rolled.

See you coach,
Billy Ba’al
Reporter, End Times
- Riley
Tournaments played:
Playing in:
CHC Season 32
Trophies won:


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